MY FELLOW CITIZENS
Our many differences far outweigh
what we have in common. For this reason
I have bundled ten years’ accumulation
of newspapers, blocked my windows with them,
setting aside a sufficient quantity
to seal up my doors & chimney
at the appropriate time. Now,
I pause to ask you, what is the significance
of a teddy bear abandoned on the beach
while a car radio blares Bessie Smith
singing, “I went to the gypsies to have
my fortune read?" We are dealing here
with the imperfect science of omens
& coincidences. You may be familiar
with the placard I wave at passing motorists
near the entrance to the Holland Tunnel:
Day & night, rain or shine, this is
my humble way of apologizing for
the small tragedy that occurred
when my home-built laser weapon
missed its intended target, hitting
an outbound passenger jet several
miles off the coast of Long Island.
I was aiming at the Statue of Liberty,
that evil whore of miscegenation.
No exposure of the truth is possible
while liberal media censorship is imposed
through a right wing conspiracy
backed by the Elders of Zion
in collaboration with Hollywood
& the Southern Baptist Convention.
Surrealistic techniques are commonly used
to metamorphosize TV images -
what are we really seeing?
We know Andre Breton was a communist,
Ezra Pound was some sort of facist,
their World War Two correspondence
suppressed by the Executive Branch.
But we cannot account for an ex-officio
poet laureate of The United States
recently lamenting our reliance upon
the subjective “I” in the poem,
suggesting that in its place we substitute
the phrase, “my teddy bear”, then
publicly regretting the failure
of his first marriage!
Shortly after witnessing this shameful vulgarity,
I heard about an obese, thrice-divorced
woman living in trailer park
outside a military base in Texas.
This unhappy female became a Mormon
after she went to the gypsies
to have her fortune read.